White people jokes
How do white guys satisfy their wives?
They hire a pool boy.
Why don’t people tell white jokes?
They want to keep their jobs.
What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers?
The redneck virgin.
What do you call a white man in the ghetto?
What is the scariest thing about a white person in prison?
You know he did it.
Why do white people own so many pets?
Because we’re not allowed to own people anymore.
What do you call 1 white guy surrounded by a court of black people?
Why are redneck murder cases the hardest to solve?
Because all the DNA matches and there are no dental records.
How did the white boy come out of the grocery store with a six pack?
He walked in and payed for it.
What do you call a white guy who needs to go somewhere across town but does not own an automobile?
What do you call a white woman with a yeast infection?
Crackers with cheese.
What’s white and fourteen inches long?
Why did the white guy go to the black guy’s yard sale?
To get his stuff back.
What’s the flattest surface to iron your jeans on?
A white girl’s ass!
What do you call a White man with a sheep under each arm?
What do you call a black guy with millions of white friends?
What do you call a white person playing with gasoline?
A fire cracker.
What do you call 200 white men chasing a black man?
The PGA Tour.
What do you call a white boy screaming as dragged down the highway behind a black man’s pickup truck?
A white lane marker.
What does a white woman make for dinner?
What do you call a white cop?
What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
What’s the difference between a white man and a snake?
One is a evil, cold-blooded, venomous, slimy creature of Satan, and the other is a snake.
What does a white man do at the club?
Pout while all the colored folk are bumpin’ & grindin’ with all of his fine white bitches.
Why shouldn’t white people go swimming?
Because crackers get soggy when wet.
What do you call a white guy on “Jeopardy?”
What does a white man say when he catches his wife cheating on him?
“I forgive you”
Why did the white man visit the moon?
He heard that the indians had land there.
What did a white guy see when he looked at his family tree?
A straight line!
What did the white woman do after she spilled hot coffee on her legs?
File a lawsuit.
What did the white man do before his blood test?
Why do white people like to play hockey?
It’s the only other way to beat something black up if they’re not a cop.
What does a white man do when he is unhappy with our current government decisions?
He writes a letter.
What do you call a mob of white people in Detroit burning down the city?
A hockey victory.
How do you stop five white guys from raping a white woman?
Throw them a golf ball.
Where would you see a white man trying to break up a fight with black men?
On the ground unconscious.
What do you call a whit e man in court?
What do you call a white person when he’s mad?
A cry baby.
How long does it take for a white women to take a crap?
What do you call it when a white man dancing has a seizure?
What do you call a mob of white people in Alabama?
What do you call a bunch of white guys in a circle?
A Dope Ring!
What do u call a bunch of white people in a bowl?
What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane?
Why cant white men jump?
They were too busy making racist jokes.
How many white people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None they’ll have a nig*** do it!
How many white girls does it take to screw in a light?
None, white girls can’t screw.
How many white men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, white men will screw anything.
Why do so many white people get lost skiing?
It’s hard to find them in the snow.
What do Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?
They are both black people with white faces.
You know what sucks about being white?
Not much, really. I mean, there are starving people in Africa, and all those tsunami victims in Asia… I’d say we’re pretty lucky.
What do you say when you see a white man carrying a TV?
“Excuse me sir, you dropped your receipt!”
Why did the white man cross the road?
Because he needed something that was on the other side of the road.
Why did white people own slaves?
They were not strong enough to pick cotton – weak bastards.